The word ’emotion’ includes the word ‘motion’, it’s 6 out of the 7 characters. I think this implies 80% action and 20% feeling. Unfortunately, we often flip the ratio when things get hard.
If I treat myself as a business, a restaurant. Does a bad review make me feel bad? Yes. And nervous, angry, defensive, sad – that’s natural. Does it stop the restaurant from opening the next day? Probably not. Why do people operate differently when it comes to personal life?
Discipline helps to mitigate the emotion. Discipline to take action, even if it’s not the optimal quality.
34 was a year of liberation. Millie turned 4 and now enjoys art and craft, I have more time on my own. I changed job after almost 7 year stay, it brought the opportunity to live in the US for 30 days. That was an unimaginable and incredible experience.
This was the third or fourth offer in the 6 months search. I had enough sample size to know 60% this could work.
It was still scary about leaving the people and place I worked for 6 plus year. It was comfortable, even with much frustrations. The doubt never went away: what if this doesn’t work out? What if I’m not qualified enough? How can I come back?
I carried it with me to the new job, and the lack of thereof gave me a good push to perform.
It’s what’s unknown that scares me, once I’m in it, I figured how to navigate. And this decision gave me the opportunity to experience different culture, project, skill, and lifestyle.
2). I deeply enjoy feeling good physically
I ran my first 10K in April. I had my last cigarette on my last day of work, June 20th. As of the time of writing, I run twice a week, weight lift twice a week, and swim once a week. I feel strong, that gives me confidence and feeds mental strength, it cycled back to my exercise and work performance. This feels deeply satisfying.
3). Spending is a source of my anxiety
I tracked my income and expense since second grade, it’s a thing I’ve been doing for 2+ decades. In the past year or two, this has brought me fatigue and tension in the household. I knew how to save and I would try to squeeze the last % if I need to sacrifice. But I don’t know how to spend, and I found this wouldn’t last long. One can only stress for enough time before giving up.
4). Work is necessary
We took a 9 day family trip to Malaysia during the break between two jobs. Day 7, midway at Penang, it felt either bored and anxious not to work at all.
To 35
35 will focus on learn to be happy. Not to degrade the performance, but learn to reward myself properly.
1). Learn to spend
“Spend extravagantly on the things you love, and cut costs mercilessly on the things you don’t.” ― Ramit Sethi
Linda and I setup another individual envelop for fun money, approximately 5% of our monthly income, split in half. We will try the approach to “save for ___”, to save for a goal, a bigger reward.
2). Publish more
This terrifies me. It’s the reason I started the blog; it’s the reason I procrastinate endlessly.
“The degree of fear equates to the strength of Resistance” ― Steven Pressfield
Sometimes things get tough at work or in life, sometimes it creates a domino effect into other aspects. A badly done project at work leads to a bad mood, unintentionally brought it home and it leads to an argument with our partner; then it kept us from sleeping at night and the lack of sleep leads to a bad performance at work. It turns into a loop.
Keep something small everyday, a 5-line journal, read for 15 minutes during lunch; something that reminds us of “accomplishment”. It helps when things get muddy.
Ever since my daughter born in December 2020, the exercise volume axes in half in 2021; then I transit to product marketing in November 2021, the number hit rock bottom in 2022 and 2023 as I tried to balance between raising a toddler, rebuilding a team, and personal habit. There were multiple breakdowns these two years.
Life becomes more controllable after she turned 3 and work become more stable after year 1. Here’s the temporary schedule that worked: read bed time story at 9pm, leave for the gym at 10-ish, and begin workout at 10:30, end around 11:30pm.
At 33, the metabolism slowed greatly compare to the 20s, 2 years of missing exercise made the it difficult to recover. The body is keen toward bloated after sugary or greasy meal. On average, I gained 1.5kg to 2kg of fat in the past 2 years; removing it is the next short term goal.
2. Family first
The transition to product marketing introduced bureaucracy in a new height. After endless leveraging, setting up barriers, picking sides, the one thing that remains is myself and my family. At the end of the day, family is purpose for financial income and a good sleep is related to keeping my core belief.
3. The world is BIG
I visited Thailand, Japan, and United States this year in personal travel and business trip. The opportunity to take a step out is a great reminder on the size and possibility in this world. If this boat flips, it probably won’t drown me.
The adrenaline of experiencing the unexpected felt great. We tried two day micro trips for the weekend and saving 5% of month income for the big one.
4. Financial number gaining traction
As the investment surpasses NT$ 2m and the global stock market continue to raise, I finally felt the effect of compound interest this year. The overall market growth and dividend re-investment accounts for 30% of the current portfolio value. This is not the best return, but it’s not about shooting the moon in the short term, it’s about a good sleep everyday.
