On 34
34 was a year of liberation. Millie turned 4 and now enjoys art and craft, I have more time on my own. I changed job after almost 7 year stay, it brought the opportunity to live in the US for 30 days. That was an unimaginable and incredible experience.
Milestones
- Exercise time more than doubled last year
- Changed job after 6.8 years
- Lived in US for a month
- Stopped smoking and started running
Lessons from 34
1). 60% confidence is actionable
This was the third or fourth offer in the 6 months search. I had enough sample size to know 60% this could work.
It was still scary about leaving the people and place I worked for 6 plus year. It was comfortable, even with much frustrations. The doubt never went away: what if this doesn’t work out? What if I’m not qualified enough? How can I come back?
I carried it with me to the new job, and the lack of thereof gave me a good push to perform.
It’s what’s unknown that scares me, once I’m in it, I figured how to navigate. And this decision gave me the opportunity to experience different culture, project, skill, and lifestyle.
2). I deeply enjoy feeling good physically
I ran my first 10K in April. I had my last cigarette on my last day of work, June 20th. As of the time of writing, I run twice a week, weight lift twice a week, and swim once a week. I feel strong, that gives me confidence and feeds mental strength, it cycled back to my exercise and work performance. This feels deeply satisfying.
3). Spending is a source of my anxiety
I tracked my income and expense since second grade, it’s a thing I’ve been doing for 2+ decades. In the past year or two, this has brought me fatigue and tension in the household. I knew how to save and I would try to squeeze the last % if I need to sacrifice. But I don’t know how to spend, and I found this wouldn’t last long. One can only stress for enough time before giving up.
4). Work is necessary
We took a 9 day family trip to Malaysia during the break between two jobs. Day 7, midway at Penang, it felt either bored and anxious not to work at all.
To 35
35 will focus on learn to be happy. Not to degrade the performance, but learn to reward myself properly.
1). Learn to spend
“Spend extravagantly on the things you love, and cut costs mercilessly on the things you don’t.” ― Ramit Sethi
Linda and I setup another individual envelop for fun money, approximately 5% of our monthly income, split in half. We will try the approach to “save for ___”, to save for a goal, a bigger reward.
2). Publish more
This terrifies me. It’s the reason I started the blog; it’s the reason I procrastinate endlessly.
“The degree of fear equates to the strength of Resistance” ― Steven Pressfield